It’s Been a Couple Weeks…

It’s Been a Couple Weeks…

It’s Been a Couple Weeks… So I was making some appetizers to have when we watched the Royals vs Mets in Game 5 and I told Bruce I haven’t written a blog post in a couple weeks because I haven’t been inspired and he said that’s a post in itself… I was like Ummm you know what you are right! I promised myself I would only write one if it meant something to me… If it was meaningful to me. I have a lot of half written ones but nothing completed. I’ve been to Georgia to help Jade move to a new apartment, been working in the office and working out! Life has been busy that’s for sure! Have you ever experienced that with half completed projects… Not feeling inspired? Well if you have you are not a lone! I think right now I am in a more reflective space. I just finished listening to Brene Brown’s new book Rising Strong (which had me thinking a lot about my past), I’m currently listening to Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert about creative living which is what I desperately need in my life now…creativity.  I’m also reading The Crossroads of Should and Must, Find and follow your passion. Wow really Rene… Yep that’s me reading about how to be a better version of myself… How can I show up in the world being all I’m intended to be! So here I am… Not a lot to say other than you and me… We are in this journey of life together! I’m doing some painting with a friend to open up my...
Hustle for Your Worthiness…

Hustle for Your Worthiness…

 Hustle for Your Worthiness…   This past week I have a lot of time to myself since my guys were off on a boy’s trip. I have read a lot… spend time with my friends and thought a lot and let’s not forget, I did get some work done too 😉 I was walking with a friend and we were talking about our past… I was thinking about my last post with my daughter Jade. A lot of my life I stood outside my story “my other life” hustling for my worthiness. If I really share and they know my past what will they think… what will it look like to others. I do a lot of self-reflection… self work to always find the good… to show up better in the world. You know what I realized after this week?… most of us end up in the same place… it doesn’t matter that our life’s circumstances will be different anything from traumatic childhood, bankruptcy, divorce, failed business… you name it… in the end we struggle to feel worthiness, that we are enough because maybe our past choices didn’t turn out how we hoped… maybe we did our best and that didn’t cut it.   There are so many choices that we can look back on and say I would do that different… Yes that’s great because if you said you would do that different that is wisdom and wisdom comes from learning and growing from an experience. When we step into the arena of life we can get knocked down… beat up… what happens from there… well I’m reading Brene...
She’s My Best Friend…

She’s My Best Friend…

I missed last Monday post because this post is one that I just couldn’t get out quickly… it’s probably one that is closest to my heart and I wanted to give it the time needed to allow me to express and share. My daughter Jade is my best friend. But let me take you back over 10 years ago. I am not the same woman today as the one I was 10 years ago. I have referenced in one of my posts about “my other life” and I said I will get back to that another time. Well it’s that time… My “other life” was when I had a software business that I was trying to make successful. Sounds good right? Well I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I will take you back with me…. I was approached by my father about the idea of creating a software business. Initially, I said no. I wasn’t interested, but with hesitation I agreed anyway. As years passed, this business was slowly turning into a monster that was creating hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt. The successful life I was trying to create was beginning to unravel. What I valued most, well I lost sight of that and became disconnected. I was on the phone all the time, handling my developing business venture. When Jade would come home from school. I would raise my hand to silence her and say, just a few more minutes; those minutes turned into hours. So here is a story told by Jade that she vividly remembers from when she was around 6...
Do I Believe in Myself?

Do I Believe in Myself?

Do I Believe in Myself?   My friend Katie called me out…   this weekend we were having a BBQ for a friend that was moving away. There is this game called Spike Ball…. I avoid it at all cost because how I don’t think I would be good at it. I guess, I have this level I want to perform at and I don’t give myself enough grace to learn and do well. So anyway back to Katie… someone said let’s play spike ball and Katie said come on Rene let’s play and my immediate response was: Katie you don’t want me on your team; you will lose. She said Rene come on I believe in you but you don’t believe in yourself.   Then she said “Why should I believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself?”… man that hit me! I work at this self-improvement stuff daily and here I am saying don’t pick me as your partner.   My lack of self esteem in certain things… Crazy! I hold myself at such a high standard that sometimes I won’t even allow myself to participate because I think I wont’ meet that standard. Ugh … the realization of truth in that statement made me… mad, sad an yet kind of excited. I am reading Brene Brown’s new book “Rising Strong” and there is a part that I thought was so good I read it a couple times… “Our ego is the part of us that cares about our status and what other people think, about always being better than and always being right. I think of my ego...
Mom I almost died today…

Mom I almost died today…

 Mom I almost died today…   So Sunday started like most Sunday’s… Went to Crossfit worked out with amazing people! Finished and got a call from my daughter, I don’t answer because I can’t really talk yet. My son KC says, “ mom jade texted and said she was in a car accident.” She then called Bruce. I’m listening but can’t figure out if everything is ok. Bruce gets done and said she is ok… Everything is ok. She then calls me a couple minutes later and I asked her to send me picture of her car and the car that hit her. Ok so look at the car  that hit her… I was like OMG. Jade is ok and her car wasn’t nearly as damaged as the car that hit her. Later in the day she called and we talked about life… school… friends… you name it. I said to her I need to go in a minute because I need to make dinner… And she said Mom I almost died today… you have more time to talk to me. Truth is… all we have is this moment. When I talked to Jade I said I know life is precious… and the truth is we don’t know if we will be here tomorrow. I know it’s a big grand thought… but come on… do we have more than this moment? No we don’t… I know for me I sometimes take for granted the life I have… my kids… my friends…my family etc. I wake up and say good morning to my husband, to my son KC and my...
Crossfit : Is it Really that Great?

Crossfit : Is it Really that Great?

  Crossfit: Is it Really that Great?   Saturday I was sitting at the beach watching Bruce out in ocean with a friend…. Watching KC with the biggest smile and that smile meant everything to me because the waves were big and he was scared to go out in the ocean. We talked or should I say I talked to him about being in the arena… life isn’t about sitting on the outside watching… it’s about going in when we are afraid.   We can be brave and afraid at the same time… he listened and said nothing. The next round of everyone going out in the ocean our friend said come KC… come out with us and he did… so that smile he gave riding the wave… well it was pretty awesome. So what does that have to do with Crossfit? Well when I first started Crossfit I was scared… new stuff in group setting… not for me. I was a runner… do my own thing. I even did P90X because it was in my house. I have to be honest I only tried Crossfit because the owners came into our office as patients and said we had to try it and I was like Ok! Well you know what that meant… I don’t say something unless I mean it so it meant I would have to at some point. I dragged my feet as long as I possible could until I thought I said I would and I will… I can be brave and afraid at the same time. I have talked to KC about how I completely...